it's all because of you
by ryugazaki
Summary: It's the first year of their life together, the first year that they're really Haru and Rei and nothing else.


uhhh

I decided to wait on the road trip au because i was too busy rushing it than actually taking the time to write it out and give it something better than i did. i wasn't happy with it at all.

so, i will continue reiharu week even though emtechnically/em i missed the first two days but i will definitely do the next five.

today's prompt is seasons! so let's do this!

it's like four and it's sos so late so i didn't edit, i never do. sorry for any mistakes!

* * *

It's winter and their apartment is _freezing _cold.

A few days ago, the heater broke in the apartment and it's been nothing but frigidly cold within their home. No matter how many angry phone calls Rei makes to the maintenance man, they _still _haven't come to the building to figure out what went wrong.

The temperature in their apartment nearly matches the winter wonderland outside and the only thing keeping them warm was a small radiator heater they purchased at the store, the tons of blankets they curled themselves up under, oh and _body heat_.

(Many nights might have been spent more tangled in the sheets than underneath them but it's not like either one of them were complaining about it, really.)

Even now, Rei laughs a little into the messy strands of Haru's hair as Haru presses kisses to his jaw, lazily thrusting his hips up to meet Rei's. They're both soft but that doesn't stop Haru from trying.

What does is Rei pressing his hands to his hips, stilling them where they are and Haru whines in the back of his throat. Rei laughs again. "Haruka, Haruka, _Haruka._" Haru sighs into the skin of Rei's throat because his name sounds so so gorgeous coming from Rei like that, breathy and happy. "We've done it like _three _times today."

"Not enough," Haru mumbles, nipping at Rei's collarbone and he nearly grins at the sharp intake of breath that results from it. "Still cold." Because that's the excuse they use now whenever this happens, their little heater isn't enough to keep them warm, they had to find something else. "Plus, you're the one that said body heat would keep us warm." His words are a little slurred together, pressed tightly against the curve of Rei's shoulder as he places kisses to it, scraping his teeth against it.

"I meant..." Rei pauses to _moan _quietly and Haru does smile a little in pride at that, "I meant... cuddling, not.. not _sex." _

"I don't hear you complaining," mumbles Haru as he moves his head toward Rei's chest, fingers trace the muscles there as he nuzzles his face into his chest. He kisses once, twice, before brushing his tongue against the outline of Rei's pectorals and then Rei does moan, louder than before and Haru kind of wants to shout in victory, just a little. "Actually," He continues, fingers pressing against the peaks of his nipples and Rei squrims this time, face buried into Haru's hair, "I think you were _begging _for it, quite a bit."

Rei makes a strangled noise low in his throat and Haru feels him shift, feels him push his face into the pillow and Haru knows that he's trying to conceal his blush. Haru snorts, lifting his head then his hand to place it on the back of Rei's neck, fingertips tracing patterns absentmindedly. Rei glances at him, half his face turned toward Haru and Haru _does _see the red of his cheeks nearly blending into the red of his glasses. It's cute. And Haru tells him so.

Which just results in Rei nearly choking and concealing his face into the pillow.

Haru laughs this time around, raising himself up on an elbow only to lean down and kiss Rei's cheek, the one that he can see, until Rei turns his head to face him again and then Haru kisses him properly, slow and deep.

Rei whimpers in the pit of his chest and Haru feels it vibrate against him, a low whine that has Haru pushing Rei into the mattress to kiss him in every other place he can find, to get those answering noises that he likes from Rei so much.

It's winter and even though their heat is broken, Haru still finds himself very, _very _warm.

* * *

It's spring and the windows are open, the bustle of the city is loud in their silent apartment.

Rei and Haru are sitting at their kitchen table, papers and bills spread around them and Haru feels like he might explode from the stress, all the expenses they have staring at them and taunting them.

Rei's looking over them, mumbling under his breath (probably trying to figure out their budget) while Haru just _stares _and tries not to rip them apart out of anxiety.

Haru sighs quietly under his breath, running a hand through his hair before muttering, "I'll get another job, one that actually pays to help out."

Rei looks up from the paper he's holding, surprise etched over his face as Haru averts his eyes. "What?"

Haru folds and unfolds the letter in front of him - telling them that they're late paying _something _- and shrugs his shoulder as if what he's saying is not a big deal, "I'll put my art on hold, get a job to help out."

He feels bad leaving all of the responsibilities to Rei, leaving all the bills to him to pay and to keep up with. It's not that Haru doesn't chip in but he doesn't make much as an independent artist and it's a little rare when someone buys his art for a decent price.

(They've made it up to this point, but it gets hard sometimes because Haru can see the black bags under Rei's eyes from lack of sleep, from stress eating away at him and he _hates _it.)

Rei's hand is reaching out, grasping his in a light hold and Rei kind of laughs, snorts humorlessly as he lifts Haru's hand to his mouth, pressing a kiss to his knuckles, "You don't have to do that, we're fine, Haruka." Haru can only stare at him, a little wide eyed because how can Rei _say _that when the evidence was staring at them?

They weren't fine, not even close.

Haru wants to glare at him, but he doesn't because even as Rei runs his fingers over Haru's, goes back to reading his paper, he looks _tired and exhausted. _He looks older than he is and Haru doesn't like it.

"But we're not fine. We're running out of money, aren't we?" Haru mumbles, eyebrows knitted as he tightens his hold on Rei's hand. Rei looks at him again, frowning a little this time.

"We are, we'll get through, we always do."

Now, Haru kind of wants to yell because Rei's being too calm about it and Haru doesn't want _calm. _He wants Rei to look as stressed as he feels, because Haru knows that he is. Just why won't Rei _show it? _

"I'll get a job." Haru repeats, words stronger and through clenched teeth.

Rei cocks an eyebrow, places his paper down as he gives his full attention to Haru. "You don't have to do that, really. I took up tutoring students, so we should get some extra money soon. It'll be fine."

_Fine. _There's that word again, they were not _fine. _

"Why won't you let me get a job, why is it always _your _responsibility?" Haru feels angry now, feels like a kid that won't get his way and Rei acts too much like a parent and sheltering Haru from things like that.

Rei looks positively bewildered that Haru would even ask a thing. So he hesitates, pauses for a moment before he answers. "Because it won't make you happy." _  
_

"Excuse me?'

Rei sighs like this is all too much effort as he turns his whole body toward Haru and gets that serious look on his face. "Getting a job just for the sake of money won't make you happy. You have a job, Haruka. You're an artist, it's been your passion for as long as I've known you. More so than swimming, really. You've wanted to do that forever. Doing anything else won't make you happy. And that's all I want, I don't care what we have and what we don't have. If you're happy, then that's what matters."

Haru's shocked speechless, as he usually is whenever Rei does something like that. Whenever he speaks his mind with no problem, says emotions and feelings like their math equations he's known forever. Haru watches in silence as Rei goes back to looking over the bills and Haru feels something building up in his throat and he thinks he might be his heart and every _emotion _he's ever felt for this boy just sitting there where he can't swallow, can't bring them down because they're overflowing on him.

It's spring and they don't hardly have any money, but the over amount of love they have for each other is enough for now.

* * *

It's summer and they're camping out in Makoto's backyard in Iwatobi.

It's been a while since they have seen the others and Nagisa had called everyone over to Makoto and Rin's for a makeshift camping experience.

And that makeshift camping experience was three tents sitting in their backyard. One held Nagisa, one held Makoto and Rin and the third one was given to Haru and Rei.

Nagisa had warned them that no couple-y stuff was to go down, including anything less than family friendly (causing Makoto to nearly burst in flames from his blush and Rei to yell in a high pitched tone '_Nagisa-kun!'_.)

But Haru's very sure that nothing like that was going to even happen between the two of them, not with the way Rei is facing away from him - mad - in the tent, not making any contact at all.

Haru's apology is stuck in his throat, and he wants to turn around to tell it to Rei, to make everything between them better than it is now. But he can't, because he let his stupid insecurities get in the way and his childish fears be there too.

Rei shifts besides him but it's not closer, it's to get more comfortable and all Haru can do is stare at Rei's back, stare at the butterfly pattern of his pajamas and try not to choke on his words.

"Rei..." He starts and immediately, Rei answers back with a stern tone.

"What?"

Haru blinks his eyes and he thinks that something is gathering there, something wet and heavy and he doesn't like it. He wishes he was better with apologising, really. He wishes this was easy, that he could say the words and everything would be okay.

But it's never been easy, not before and not now.

There's a large silence hanging over them, like a blanket that's scratchy and uncomfortable and Haru just wants to roll over and go to sleep and hope that this goes away in the morning.

But then Rei speaks through it, throwing the blanket of silence off of them and mumbling, "I'm sorry."

Haru nearly jolts with surprise because why is Rei apologising? "... What?"

There's nothing but quiet for a heartbeat, for two before Rei rolls over to look at Haru through thin red frames and a sober look on his face. "I'm sorry." he repeats and all Haru can do is stare at him dumbly.

(He's supposed to be the one saying those words, not Rei. It's not Rei's fault that Haru lets petty feelings get in the way of things, that his jealousy is something terrible and large and always with him.)

Rei is speaking against, through the haze of Haru's surprise, "I know you've never liked whenever Nagisa hangs all over me, I know he still... has a crush on me," Rei frowns, eyebrows tight together as he struggles through his words, doing better than Haru would have. "I didn't mean to make you uncomfortable in any way, Haruka. It was never about anyone else but _you_, you get that, right?"

There's more quiet, more tension in the air before Haru just blurts out. "I'm sorry."

And it's Rei's turn to look surprised and before he could even question, Haru just rushes out with, "I didn't mean to get jealous over him, over him being all over you. It's always been like that, I don't know why it would be any different. I'm just... I don't want anyone else to take you away, I'm afraid you'll find someone else, someone better than me. And I don't want that, I didn't mean to be so jealous over it. It's always been you and I want it to be you forever but I always get so afraid that you'll find someone better, and they'll take you away and I don't want you to be taken away from me. I _need _you." His words come out in a rush and there's a moment of pause before Rei -

- before Rei _laughs. _He laughs, actually laughs after Haru gets done talking and Haru is confused but he can't dwell on it because Rei is wrapping himself around him and pulling him toward him, against the curve of his body and he's _kissing _him, like he means it.

It's a moment or two before it ends and Rei settles his forehead against Haru's. "We're idiots, aren't we?" He kisses Haru's nose, causing Haru to wrinkle the bridge at the tickling sensation and Rei chuckles once more, "You don't need to be afraid, Haruka. It's never been anyone but you. I love _you. _And I always have and I always will, okay?"

Haru looks at Rei, looks into violet looking back at him and Haru knows that it's the same for him, always has been. It's never going to be any different.

It's summer and in the night heat, Haru kisses Rei again and whispers how much he loves him back, because it's true.

* * *

It's autumn and the leaves are falling and it's chilly outside but nothing too cold.

They're not outside though, they're inside in their kitchen with a mess around them.

Halloween is coming up and Haru wanted to make jack-o-lanterns, a tradition he's only done with the Tachibanas. It's something he wants to do now, because he's always loved the carving aspect and the art aspect of it.

But now - now he loves how squeamish Rei is by the seeds and lining of the pumpkin and how he hates to touch it. It makes it so much better and _funnier _when Haru pins Rei down on the floor of their kitchen by sitting on his stomach and holding a handful of pumpkin guts in his hand, right above his face.

"Haruka! _Haruka, don't!_" Rei nearly screeches, trying to fight his way from Haru's weight on him as Haru tries not to laugh, smooths his face into his normal apathetic expression as he goes to lower his hand, strings of seeds hanging in between his fingers. Rei's eyes go wide and he tries to push Haru off but Haru counteracts by grabbing his wrists with one hand and holding them above Rei's head.

(A position that is a little _too _familiar with them but in the moment, it's not about that. It's about torturing Rei.)

Haru knows that the neighbours are going to complain because Rei is being loud, and not in the sense they're probably used to. But Haru lowers his hand more and Rei _whimpers _like a hurt puppy when the insides of the pumpkin are closer to his face, the smell of it strong around the room. "Haruka... Haruka, _no._"

"Why not?" Haru asks, all nonchalant, "Don't like it?" he squeezes his hand, the sounds making Rei contort his face into disgust. Haru enjoys this, a little too much as Rei squirms to get away from him, whining and yelping as Haru leans forward, leans his hand forward.

He chuckles soon after, laughing not far behind that as he leans forward all the way only to kiss Rei on his opened mouth, pressing into him quickly as he gets there. He laughs into Rei's mouth, a squeak of surprise escaping Rei's throat.

Haru pulls back just a little, nudges his nose against Rei's as Rei _glares _at him, nothing behind it because Haru kisses him again, kisses him twice before pulling back to look at him once more. "You're way too cute," he says, watching in fascination as Rei goes red, eyes widening at Haru's words and doing that sputtering thing when he's embarrassed.

Haru doesn't let him go because he wants to kiss him more, so he does. He presses Rei to the tile floor of their kitchen - uncomfortable, no doubt - and it's not long before Rei responds to it, getting distracted as Haru kisses him senseless.

Rei's distracted enough so Haru can shove his hand with the pumpkin insides in it up Rei's shirt, presses them to his bare abdomen and he laughs again when Rei yelps and attempts to scramble away from him even with Haru's weight on him.

It's autumn and Haru's learned something new about his boyfriend that he might use against him next Halloween.

* * *

It's winter again and Haru knows the cycle will continue. He knows that in the next few days the heater is going to break and they will be cold as ever.

The cycle will continue but Haru's alright with that. They made it through their first year, living together. Even through all their problems and all their moments, Haru doesn't mind that their heater will break or they might have problems trying to learn to be adults. Haru just needs Rei by his side through it all, through every season just right next to him.

He thinks they're going to be okay if they have each other.

* * *

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